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Behind the Design

How both Mars and Venus can love a room

By Susan Pantaleo, ASID -- Furniture Today, January 14, 2007

Will men ever appreciate the function of a toss pillow? Will women understand the appeal of a chair with built-in cup holders? Can we all just get along?

There was a time when design decisions were "woman's work." No more! I'm finding that when my design client is a couple, the man has just as much to say about style as his partner. What changed? Women are now an integral part of the workplace and men are discovering their sensitive side. Couples are inspired by watching HGTV together. Time is at a premium for both and that makes sharing the design decisions highly desirable.

As a designer, one of my biggest challenges is acting as counselor and negotiator between the male and female of the household. The difficulty is classic Mars vs. Venus. Men are driven by function and practicality. Women are driven by emotional reaction and beauty.

Most men look at furniture and think, "What does it do?" Women, on the other hand, want the room to feel good. Understanding the priorities of each will help you help them create the perfect space.

From a design standpoint, masculine is interpreted as large scale, straight lines, bold structure and materials with inherent interest, such as wood graining or an exotic place of origin. Feminine is recognizable by curved lines, delicate proportions, embellished detailing and touchy-feely fabrics. Both want high quality and good value, but each weighs the importance differently.

The most successful solutions find common ground, with a touch of compromise. Furniture and rooms with favorite elements for each individual will satisfy both. One key to success is careful attention to the scale of the furniture. His bold leather sofa does not go next to her delicate tea table.

Another approach is to place her favorite robin's-egg blue washed finish on his Chippendale secretary, resulting in a gender-neutral piece. Take a look at the typical hot buttons for each sex, then add your client's personal preferences and you have a mix-and-match list for building their personal look.

Hot buttons for men

Function

Clean, straight lines

Leather and firm fabrics

Bold patterns or solids

High quality

Easy access

Details inherrent in material

Hot buttons for women

Beauty

Romantic, curved lines

Silk and touchable fabrics

Delicate patterns and sheen

Good value

Hidden function

Embellished applied details

Juxtaposition of masculine and feminine features will bring a room into balance and creates a wonderful relationship, for both the room and the people living in it. With a little give and take, everyone can live happily ever after.

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